she does not want to lead

Too hard she says.
She makes it hard on her self.
I try but she just keeps on doing doing doing.

Floods

We have been flooded here in Brisbane Australia.

The submissive side seems to have taken a bit of a back seat.

not much happening

Time I think to have another discussion with her about my submission.

The busyness of Christmas and New years is out of the way. Now we can relax and holiday for a while.

What do I really want
Intimate sex.
Her to orgasm
Her to enjoy sex.
Her to enjoy herself and feel good about herself.
Validation of my existence from her.
Tease
Tease and denial.
Being spanked

I would love her to turn into some kind of dominatrix complete with short leather skirt and whip. Unlikely but that is what I would like.

I would like her to overtly control when I cum. I would like her to have me penetrate her and bring her to orgasm with out me getting to cum.

no effort

We had sex last night but
she was tired.
she had said in the morning she was tired and would need an afternoon sleep.
whenever she is tired she never gets turned on (sweeping generalisation here)
So the bedroom doors were left open (limits noise making opportunities)
She asked for lube then later said that it was "too easy" and maybe she needs to have to make more effort to get me inside her - I agree there.

She said she was doing it so we would both get a good night sleep. OK fair enough so I said, all you have to do is tell me to lie still and not disturb you and you will achieve your good nights sleep. Even when I was inside her and she had decided she was not going to cum, I offered again. I said you can just tell me to pull out now. Have fun. Take charge. tease.

instead she gave some smacks on the bottom. Not so hard though. I asked if I could close the doors to contain the noise so she could smack me harder but she said no.

She said she wanted me to cum. I have been trying to do whatever she asks without arguing so once she had said that I humped a but harder and came but it was not anything more than a physical release.

pity.
lazy sex is my term for it.

So I am disappointed that she did not make the effort to have a sleep.
I am disappointed that she then did not just say "not tonight"
Bit negative all round actually.

First night back with wife

I cooked dinner,
washed up.

Later I got into bed and lay there. She had a shower and came into the bed room stark naked. I asked if she would like a back massage. She said no not a back massage but that I could give her a foot massage. She then lay on her back still naked and I massaged her feet. She fell asleep. I figured I would just keep massaging as she had not told me to stop. I was feeling very much submissive and turned on.

Eventually she woke up and said thank you. Then she said she was going to sleep and that I was not to disturb her. I asked about sex and she said maybe we will keep you till the end of the month. Aaaa. oooo. I am so turned on and at the same time sexually frustrated. I fun yet scary feeling.

So now I am awake and cant sleep so I figured I would write this entry.

I wonder what it would be like to say be limited to three or four orgasms per year.
I wonder which would be better- knowing the dates that it was to happen or for it to be a surprise?

Mr submissive husband has suggested doing something she would like every day. ideas?

Getting back into the groove

I have felt a little up and down recently. Perhaps the hormones from having no sex since Christmas. Perhaps that we have been apart for the last week as she has been away.

Part of me wants to return to trying to control her. memories of going shopping with her and making her buy short skirts and dresses. I have a video of her presenting a talk where she is wearing a short skirt and bends over to pick up something and her undies are briefly visible.

Part of me wants to go home, clean the house and make dinner pending her return.

Part of me wants her to tie me to the bed and whip me and inflict pain on me.

Part of me wants her to restrict my orgasms and to orgasm herself.

The problem with trying to control her is that it has drained both of us of passion. It has removed intimacy from the relationship.

Anyway tonight she is due home and so I will focus on making dinner and ensuring the house is inviting.

I like the concept of using my need for sex as a motivator to do things for her.

New year

Well its 2-JAN-11 and I have not had sex since Christmas eve.

I wonder?

During the christmas - New year break I have been wondering what a female lead society would be like. Maybe I should try to write some fiction like Mr subservient-husband .

I guess we are part way there now such that if a woman says stop then the man must stop or it becomes rape. Even if she lead him on, asked him to penetrate her and came herself and then just as he is about to cum, she tells him no. Maybe I am not a lawyer.

Imagine every man wearing a GPS tracker. Perhaps his "wife" can check his location any time. Perhaps geofences limit where he can go without his wife being alerted. If a woman or child is abducted, the police would access tracking records to see who was nearby at the time.

I reckon with women in charge totally, that public transport would be made to work.

Men would stay fit. They would be motivated to stay fit because a un fit fat husband is likely to get no sex.

Fathers with school age kids would finish work at 2pm so that they could be home by the time kids get home from school.

Beer guts would be a thing of the past. For men interested in women anyway.

Perhaps a curfew at night so men can only travel in company of a female at night.

Now that men are controlled and supervised, abduction and rape would be a thing of the past and parents would let their kids walk to school.

I wonder if women would feel more confident and likely to wear skimpy clothes in public?

Thoughts?