sleepy drunk

Abstaining from orgasm gives me energy but even a glass of wine sends me to sleep.

Last night a couple of friends dropped in and were invited to stay for dinner.  I had two glasses of wine and ended up being pretty useless.

After they left, I lay on the couch & Slept.  My wife had to do pretty much everything.
Wasking up, cleaning up, helping kids with home work, getting kids showered, into bed and anything else that had to be done.

Now I feel guilty.

The pity is that is as far as it will go.

What I wish is that she would punish me.
So that next time I have a glass of wine I would be weighing up the consequences.

I wish that she would
- Tell me verbally that she had to do everything while I slept.  To me communication is important and that it would be great of she could say that.  It should not be an argument.  Just a statement of fact.
- Tell me that she felt that I had not at the very least carried my fair share.
- Then I really wish for a whipping.  To me it would physically hurt and that is a punishment and a reminder but it's also cathardic.  A sort of cleansing.  Ready to start again.

Then I would
- Thank her
- Apologise
- Offer to do everything tonight
- Actually do everything tonight.

But she still has, as far as I can see, some kind of in grained disaproval of physical punishment, physical pain.  She still is not good in communication and so on.