Wednesday, February 25, 2015

Male and Female submission seems different

It seems to me that when I read fem dom sites and blogs (other than obvious dominatrix porn) that either way it seems to be driven by men.  Either men motivating the women to be submissive or men wishing to be submissive and trying to get the wife to be dominant.

26-feb-2015 added - Following up from a comment from DtBHC This is an interesting link on the topic.

Tuesday, February 24, 2015

ah oh. Blogger Changing.....

Dear Blogger User,

We're writing to tell you about an upcoming change to the Blogger Content 
Policy that may affect your account.

In the coming weeks, we'll no longer allow blogs that contain sexually 
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presented in artistic, educational, documentary, or scientific contexts, or 
where there are other substantial benefits to the public from not taking 
action on the content.

The new policy will go into effect on the 23rd of March 2015. After this 
policy goes into effect, Google will restrict access to any blog identified 
as being in violation of our revised policy. No content will be deleted, 
but only blog authors and those with whom they have expressly shared the 
blog will be able to see the content we've made private.

Our records indicate that your account may be affected by this policy 
change. Please refrain from creating new content that would violate this 
policy. Also, we ask that you make any necessary changes to your existing 
blog to comply as soon as possible, so that you won't experience any 
interruptions in service. You may also choose to create an archive of your 
content via Google Takeout 

For more information, please read here 

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Monday, February 23, 2015

Wrapped in Plastic

Since as early as I can remember I have been turned on by plastic.

long before puberty as a child I recall going to friends houses and checking if they had a plastic protector on their bed.  Likewise going through draws looking for nappies or plastic pants. 

I used to make plastic clothes from plastic bags and a pair of scissors.  Cut two diagonal holes for legs and three holes from a separate plastic bag for a top.  Two plastic bags required obviously.  This manufacturing started around 11 or 12.  Certainly pre puberty. 

Fast forward to married life and somewhere along the way I let my wife in on my secret.  In general sharing my inner feelings has put her off but it was my attempt to communicate.  Anyway occasionally she indulges me. 

In January was a particularly distant time for our relationship.  For some reason she has been more intimate recently.

Saturday night she wrapped me in cling film.  A bit of baby oil under it.  A most delicious feeling.  Round the waist and also through my legs and over my shoulder like a leotard.  The over the shoulder and through the legs means that it holds its shape.  If one just wraps round the tummy and chest it tends to work its way toward the middle. 

Because she does not like plastic I then put on a pair of undies and a tee shirt.  She rubbed me a little and talked about me staying in it all night. All of that was very nice.  We had a little discussion about the benefits of orgasm abstinence.  That is like my other kinks a love hate thing.  A torture myself thing.  With the plastic its see how long you can wear it.  Set the goal and test ones resilience.  Pre marriage, once I realised that I used to wrap myself and then rub myself to orgasm then I would take the plastic off, I set personal goals like trying to stay wrapped longer without orgasm and also to say set a goal of holding off orgasm until a certain time and then once orgasmed to stay wrapped for some other longer time.  In a way it is a sexual tease to try and hold off orgasm but once orgasmed the feel is much more yucky and I start to think about how I need a good nights sleep in order to do whatever the next day if that makes sense.

On the orgasm abstinence thing, when I was in high school, I spend several years in the boarding house where during term time I did not masturbate at all.  I loved the rules and the structure of it.  I also knew my place on the social ladder.  I was not part of the in crowd but I was not part of the geek pariahs either.  I would be invited to midnight parties by the in crowd for example.  There was always alcohol and sometimes girls.  One sure fire way to slip down the social ladder was to be caught masturbating.  This labelled you as a wanker.  A label once applied to a person such as me would stick forever.  So I simply did not masturbate.  It was a huge physical struggle but one I liked.  Maybe a part of my obsessive personality.  During school holidays when I went home, there was no structure.  So it was masturbation, plastic, wearing a pair of girls tights.  Kink kink kink.  I did not feel guilty.  Even though we went to church weekly, I never felt guilty. I never felt sinful if that makes sense.  But I did feel weak.  I actually used to look forward to returning to the structure and controls of school life.  Even though for the first couple of weeks at least the struggle to resist snaking off for a quick wank was always on ones mind.  Because I did not masturbate I had wet dreams.  Vivid sexual dreams that end up with my ejaculating in my pyjamas.  This had to be managed too so as to avoid arousing the suspicions that one was wanking in bed at night.  I tried sleeping always in a pair of undies with my penis tucked in pointing backwards.  I also experimented with wearing a singlet tucked into my undies to try and catch any ejaculate so that my pyjama top would stay dry and most importantly not smell of cum.

Anyway, back to Saturday night, I stayed wrapped all night.  Around 3am I awoke really turned and rubbed against my wife who obliged and rubbed me until I came and then she very kindly said "You are not to clean up till morning and don't disturb me again".  Then at dawn, having been a good boy, she started to rub me again.  Being empty it took a while.  Then with me lying face down on the mattress, she got on top and ground against me until she came.  As she was doing this she told me to put my hands on myself and cum quickly.  Which I did.  Then we lay there relaxed for a few minutes.  Just drifting.  Then it was time to get up, shower, start the day - kids sport and all.

Ah if only every day.  :)

Saturday, February 21, 2015

Just used me for sex

Well a very pleasant surprise last night.  I am a pretty light sleeper and an early morning person so being woken in the night is neither unusual nor a problem.  This morning though I was awoken by my wife pinching my nipples. 

She knows this turns me on and it was not long before I was hard.  She got on top and although somewhat dry rubbed herself against me and placed one of my hands to massage her clit and soon she was inside.  She moved and ground against me and came with a shudder.  Kissed me on the lips.  Pulled off and lay beside me.

Not a word was said.

I felt great and I assume she enjoyed it immensely because within a minute she had drifted off to sleep.

wow.  Would love that sort of thing to happen again.

Friday, February 20, 2015

50 Shades (SPOILER !!! ALERT !!!!)

The wife and I went to see the 50 shades of grey movie last night.

I was pleasantly surprised.  It was different to what I was expecting and the differences make for good points to discuss over a coffee.

Wednesday, February 4, 2015

Frustrating conversations

Here is a conversation between my wife and I
When we talk, I try to ask open questions but when Iu don't answer then I try to guess.

Me:  "What colour car do you like best?"
Wife:  (long pause)
Me:   "I think you like red cars?"
Wife:  "Well if you know what I like, why did you ask"
Me:    "I don't know what you like.  When you did not answer, I tried to prompt an answer by being a bit more specific."
Wife:  "You told me what I like:
me:     "I didn't tell you what you like I said 'I think' you like a certain colour"
Wife:  "See you get angry when we talk.  That's why I don't say anything"
Me grr gave up.  because now I was angry.

In the morning.
Wife:  "What would you like for tea tonight?"
Me:     "Well steak is my favourite but I am happy to have whatever you would like"
(In the above sentence, you can see the submissive side of me in the second half of the sentence)
Wife:  "I was thinking a chicken casserole would be nice"
Me:    "Sure that's fine.  Chicken is your favourite"
Time passes.
In the afternoon, I am taking kids to sport and my wife prepares dinner.
Setting the table.  I carry the plates from the kitchen to the dining room.  As I pick each one up, she says who it is.  Soon all places are set except hers.
Me:   "Where's yours?"
Wife: "Oh I'm having a juice detox"
grrr I think to myself.  Chicken is your favourite meat and Steak is my favourite meat.  The rest of us are eating chicken when we could have eaten steak.  We could even have all gotten on board and had a detox together and supported you.  But you decided to do a detox and not tell anyone.  The whole thing made me feel like crap.

Tuesday, February 3, 2015


 My observation about "kink" is that if you have no kink then any kink is bad.  I suspect that members of the BDSM community have a acceptance of difference / empathy that others in the community lack.

Being submissive or wearing diapers or plastic or spanking to me are all intensely personal.  Remember in that movie "Pretty Woman" Julia Roberts told Richard Gere that they could have vaginal sex but no kissing on the lips because kissing on the lips is too personal.  I think that this kinky stuff is like that.  It is so intensely personal.

I am married and my wife has absolutely no idea of the intense feelings associated with this.  She has said many times go and find someone to play out this stuff with.  The kicker here is that she sees it like going to a prostitute for sex.  You may have heard that wives often forgive their philandering husbands because they were just using the woman for sex and they don't see that as a challenge to their emotional bonds to their husband. 

Yet for me it is an even more intensely personal connection than kissing on the lips if you like.  Certainly far and a way more personal than plain old sex.

So in a way her saying "go find someone to play this out with" emphasises her complete lack of appreciation of the emotional intensity of kink.

Even so, I would love to find a play partner.  A female it would have to be to share this intimacy with.  The marriage is cold enough that if it were to break completely well in the end that may the best for both of us.