Wednesday, January 16, 2013

she forgets to ask me and short hair on women

So I still harbour submissive desires.
She is not really into the kinky bdsm dominance that I crave.

When we talk she often brings up comments like equality.

So I had to smile when she cc'd me on two emails that she had sent today. 

One email said that neither of us would be attending a church related meeting this saturday.  I looked on my calendar which incidentally also is visible to her on her phone and there are absolutly no entries on it.  She may have something on that I don't know about but he email said that neither of us would be attending the meeting.

The second email included this
"Thanks for organising this.  Yes, please can we pencil [child] into a seat with you?  I will speak with [husband] about it this afternoon - I keep forgetting to talk with him about plans."

Now does that sound like the person in charge or what?  She just gets in there and makes the decisions.

At a slightly different angle,
As old time readers would know, our family are deeply involved in our local church and the traditional view of churches is that men are in charge.  Mind you we have a female pastor and most of the people who organise things are women.  And before we were married and during the early part of our marriage, we did try to be man in charge and wife is submissive.  Ok so not so long back my wife got a short hair cut.  But our daughter has long hair partially because little girls often like the long hair princess sort of look and partially because as parents we have encouraged that as being feminine.  So anyway recently we were at the shopping mall and a mother and child there.  Initially we thought the child was a boy as the child had short back and sides but when they moved away from the counter we saw the child was wearing a dress.  My wife had told me that my daughter had asked if she could have short back and sides.  I said it was my wife's decision and that I was OK either way.  Anyway so I received a text today asking if was I still ok with my daughter getting short back and sides as my wife is planning on both of them going and getting short back and sides.  I took a deep breath.  It's kind of scary.  I guess I like girls to look like girls in the traditional sense.  But I also like the idea of not arguing with my wife.  So putting those together there is this desire that the woman who is in charge look like a woman in that traditional kind of way.  So I texted back and said "It will be very different, go for it with my love and blessing.  Have fun.  Exite me".  So I wait and I do confess with some feelings each way.  But hay its a new thing.


  1. It sounds like a wife who forgot to discuss it with you and is informing you by copying you on the email.

    Also. There is a great post out there somewhere talking about social dominance vs bedroom dominance. The author talks about submissive women who are organizing large events. They do not require their dominant partner, they are able to coordinate this large effort, which requires them to use what some consider dominant traits, but it does not make them dominant. Nor does your wife organizing something outside the he without your input make her dominant. It was probably more efficient.

    Good luck

  2. Hi Anonymous,
    Indeed my wife organises large events at our church and other places yet in the bed room does not think in a dominant way.
    Likewise I can organise and lead at work.
    I actually do not see submissive as "weak" or "Inefectual" or "unthinking" but I suspect my wife tags submissive in that way.
    Anyway, thanks for your insight.