Friday, March 24, 2017

All day ache

Balls aching all day.

The weird thing is that I don't any longer have that feeling of worry about never being able to "do it" again.

I had a conversation with my wife last night asking whether she would let me cum once we had gotten to the end of lent.  She kidnly said "We'll see".

I said I was scared

she asked why and I said that I was worried she might never let me cum again.

She said something referring to the NFP men who have to abstain.  I said that I admired their strength.  She said well you may get your wish.

We also talked about only getting to cum on special occasions like my birthday, our wedding aniversery and christmas.

I said that what I would really like is for her to be (and I forget the exact words) but that she be on board and enthusiastic and intentional whichever way.  If she wanted me to have sex with her all the time and not abstain then I wanted her to want that.  What I don't want is a "take it or leave whatever don't care" atmosphere. 

So I am aprehensive because that could mean abstaining for another couple of months.

But also It's something I'd like to do in a weird masochistic sort of way.  It would be interesting to connect with other men who abstain for extensive periods of time.  I'm hardly likely to get onto facebook and say "hey guys, which of you gets no sex and loves it"


  1. I also find it exciting/scary to think of never being allowed to cum again. We have been "playing" with orgasm control and denial for several years and my wife and I find the benefits of my not cumming to be worthwhile.
    While I find the thought of her having control to that extent appealing, I don't know how I would feel about actually doing that. All for nought I think, as she is not nearly as interested in this than I am!
    Yes, in a weird masochistic way, I do want her to not let me have sexual satisfaction in that way and to only enjoy her sexual pleasure while I am either totally denied or even, masochistically, suffering in pain and torture.

    1. Thanks MrBill, It is a scary thing and I guess I swing between wondering I am I just being silly because she isn't that engaged to well if she's not engaged in sex anyway, I'm kind of over it (sex that is) so I can have some fun with this challenge. We are weird in our own weird way.