Free wheeling

Hmm feeling a bit directionless right now.

Had the orgasm.

With the benefit of hindsight over my life that is.  Not just the last 40 days.  I think that we put too much store on orgasm.  It is the KPI of sex and sex seems to have become the KPI of relationships.

Yet look at a good TV series.  That will have sexual tension and that keeps us interested.  Will X have it off with Y.  But once they do then .... well its all over.  The interest is gone and the series is over.

I look back on my sex life and I see boring.

Sounding a bit moody here.

If the expectations built on kids were ones of less orgasm and more flirting, more teasing, more working out what worked for the other person then maybe we would have a lower divorce rate.  More kids with two parents.  More adults who are used to working it out rather than whipping it out.

But these days the advice to kids seems to be there is no harm in wanking away.  Don't put up with physical pressure.  Give into that and when the going gets hard in all areas of life, just move to the easy ground, the things you as an individual like.  The kids grow up with facebook where people "like" them.  But they do not get paired up one on one and have to work out what works for each other.

Also interesting to look back on just the last 40 days and realise that I think during that time I became a lot more "submissive" in terms of just letting my wife's decisions just flow on.  Things that would once have really annoyed me I just let pass.  I note a couple of times in the last few days that I got angry once again.  So I am in a way out of that submissive head space.