Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Not much happening

I feel the need to write.  It is cathardic.
Perhaps it was because we had sex that I do not feel so .....
I mentioned to my wife this morning as we were waking that it has been a while since she whipped me.  I said it makes me feel good and reinforces my feelings toward her being in charge.  Left it at that.

I guess I also recall the phrase "Be careful what you ask for... It may become reality".

I wonder how I would handle it if she did become overtly in control, bossy and using cororal punishment on me.  I mean severe such that it was not just a turn on but something to be feared.  Would I still enjoy it or would I be a battered spouse?  How would she feel?  Would she do it knowingly or sort of drift into it?

I also realise as I write this that I have not been as motivated to be helpful as I am when I have been denied sex.  Last night I just crashed on the couch and slept and I mean slept.  Woke myself from snoring.  I should have been doing washing up and reading with the kids.  But I was tired and lazy and there was no real consequence awaiting me.  I imagine or I wonder what I would have been like if I knew that if I did not fulfil certain tasks that I would have been severely whipped?  Would I have struggled on half asleep or would I have been motivated to be wide awake and enjoying serving?

I wonder.

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