Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Submissive vs childish

When I talk about being submissive, my wife sometimes mentions that she "already has 4 children and does not need a 5th".

 I take it that her perspective is that submissive equates to childish.

Now I would say that there are elements of truth in that I do not want to make decisions on things.  I just want her to tell me do X or do Y.  But once told, I will do.  Unlike a child who would winge, put off etc.

I suspect that some would say that being submissive means that I should preempt her desires and thoughts and 'do' whatever even before being asked.

For example, doing the washing.  One school of thought I believe is that I should just do it and the other school of thought is that if she asks, then do it.


  1. Well, it seems that if you want her to embrace your submission, you should try to be as little "childish" as possible.

    As for the tasks: Your wife could give you a list of tasks that you will fulfil regularly (or you could put up one for her to confirm), so that she won't have to tell you each and every time to do a certain ting. Yet you have the list to remind you that those things are your duty.

    Another thing that might seem childish to her ist your desire to be whipped. To her it might seem as if she has to whip you into doing certain things, behaving nicely etc. In a nutshell: as if she had to educate and train you like a child.
    Or maybe she perceives your asking to being whipped as a child's begging for being allowed to watch TV or for ever new toys.

    So, find out what aspects of your submissive behaviour she finds particularly "childish" and try to avoid those.

  2. Thanks Tamara,
    I agree that she does not want me to be childish. She said she does not want a fifth child.

    Thanks for the advice about asking about what behavious she finds childish.

    I gess another thought is submissive vs [un]willing to take responsibility.

  3. Good points.. as always!
    I think I find myself wanting to help... but often WAITING to be told, hoping she will direct me to do something... Either she does, or she does work herself and gets a little pissed at me!